Old & Warty
Wisewoman: When I fancy people, I sleep with them. Oh, I have to drug them first of course! Being so old and warty.
A classic line from Blackadder.
And now I find I am in the same predicament. Of course I don't have to drug the people I fancy, my smooth charm, quick wit and buns of steel still work their magic.
But I do have a wart.
So I've got some stuff called Cryogena. Its an aerosol of liquid nitrogen (I think). You fit a little foam pad into a a plastic key, push the key into the aerosol for a few seconds and then apply the super-cold foam pad to the wart.
The advert shoes a smiling laughing teenager with a skateboard, caring not a jot as his mum zapz his wart.
I did it and it bloody well hurt.
I know the blogosphere are on the edge of their collective seats to find out if the cure worked. I will post phtographic evidence of a wart-free well-toned thigh as proof. As soon as it is
b. well toned